crumbs
Some people (or institutions) tear others down in order to eventually rebuild them in their own image. Some of us just get torn down, period.
I read a profile of Gordon Ramsay in the New Yorker once. It was a long time ago. At that time he had, apparently, an incredibly loyal kitchen staff. That's because they were trauma-bonded to him. Ramsay would use intermittent reinforcement—"breadcrumbing"—to keep his staff starved for emotional scraps. The rest of the time he treated them poorly or otherwise kept them psychologically off-center. I think probably all toxic workplaces function this way. It's hot for about two minutes, but then you need to quit your job.
Anyway, you will not catch me watching The Bear. I will never romanticize videoga—I mean, kitchen culture—ever again.
I think maybe if you are not a good steward of something, it will ultimately be taken from you. I am trying to make peace with the fact that everything will be taken. This goes for money and resources, but also people, connections, and even one's own sovereignty.
Maybe I should exercise a little free will every day, like a muscle as a little treat.